Wednesday, June 13, 2007

in memory of ah b

IN MEMORY OF AH B

my hamster, ah b has passed away. i'm not really sure what i should feel. there's so much things burdening my mind right now. one thing after another. it just don't seem to stop.

my room seems so quiet now that he's gone.no more sound of the wheel, no more crunching sounds from him eating nuts. now, all that remains is an empty cage and maybe a few specks of saw dust. touched his body just now and it sems so hard. can't really help it if tears escaped. he was afterall, my confidante when there's no one there for me although all he did was just poking his nose out of the cage.

saw wendy cheng aka xiaxue with her boyfrind mike just now, but not really in the mood to blog about it, another day perhaps, although she is my blog idol. admire her for her writing.

signing off,

love,
chanel

ps: thanks again to well wishes, especially fel and zul. you guys are the best. =) and yea. kel too.

♥ the last words are written at 11:54 PM

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

i missed those times

THOSE TIMES

i miss those times you laugh and tease and smile with such an ease
i miss those times you'll kiss my hand and tell me you love me
i miss those times we talk and laugh for hours on the phone
i miss those times you'll hug me tight and comfort me all night
i miss those times you wipe my tears and hide me from my fears
i miss those times you'll blush and look away when i stare at you all day
i miss those times you'll message me just to say that you missed me
and most of all i miss those times for such sweet memories

i just want to go back to the past. and yes, i wrote this poem.

love,
chanel

♥ the last words are written at 11:47 AM

Sunday, June 10, 2007

never be the same again

WILL WE EVER BE THE SAME AGAIN?

dear,

if you're reading this( although i know you can't since you're in camp), i just want to tell you that i love you with every fibre of my being. i just can't help being extremely paranoid and sensitive over whatever that you do because you really mean alot to me. i hope that we'll go back to the past, when we are happy and enjoying every minute of it because i am really tired of crying so hard these days.

no mood to blog anymore. signing off

ps: to felicia and zul , thanks for being there for me when i needed someone to cry to.

♥ the last words are written at 9:45 PM

Friday, June 08, 2007

is ah b sick???

HELP! MY HAMSTER'S ACTING NORMAL!!

oh my god, i really have that gut feeling that my hamster is ill. seriously. its acting all normal. i know this may sound weird, but MY hamster does not act like normal hamsters do.

for instance, ah b always lies on its back on the wheel when it eats, so it acts all king-like with scrapes of food all over his tummy. unlike OTHER hamsters,they crouch in one corner for a meal. but that's exactly what my hamster is doing NOW.

another thing is, ah b seems to be sleeping all over the place, not only at his usual sleeping spot. and also, it seems to have shrunk in size despite eating as per normal. is there anything seriously wrong with my hamster??? i need answers!!!

is it because it is getting old? today IS its 1 year old birthday, oh well, maybe not one year, but it is exactly one year since dear bought it for me. or maybe its because i gave it too much broccolli? OR is it too much radiation from my lappy OR is it because i kept playing 'way back into love' on my lappy that ah b is starting to act emo??

i really really need answers before i freak out!!

love,

chanel

♥ the last words are written at 3:04 PM

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

whores suck!

ISSUES WITH WHORES !

i was just innocently looking at some photos of friends over friendster as i was freaking bored. so yea, i was just using looking at some other people's profile besides my own friends. i then stumbled on this certain guy's account which had me having a queasy feeling in my stomach.

this guy, who seem to be a fan of BDSM is proclaiming to the world what a freak he is. think you can attract girls like that? get a life will you?? for people who have no idea what BDSM is, well, it is Bondage & discipline ,Domination & submission ,Sadism and masochism . ok, it may seem quite fun AT FIRST but seriously, it is plain freaky. no normal girls will want to have your ass pressed against their faces OR be your human pet OR be humiliated while having sex. if those are your fantasies, that's your problem, you don't need to have the whole world sharing this particular information with you.

and yea, he wants to know me. do i freaking hell look like a whore to you??? seriously, you are not at all good looking either, so you can seriously forget about being friends with me or f**king chicks. oh yea, i'l whip him in the ass so hard that he can't sit even when he is in hell and make sure his parents sees it. how would you like that now? humiliating enough?

another thing, i seriously do not understand why girls these days are getting more and more open. ok, i might have taken a few provocative shots myself, but at least i am not as crazy as to take photos of myself in lingeries and post them online.

and what's worse is that these girls, clearly having done a freaking boob job that its almost disgusting to look and they have the cheek to call themselves 'models' when they have bloody 'whore' word written all over their face. Think its not obvious having a freaking D or E cup when you are a bloody asian? I’m not saying that all asian have small boobs but to my knowledge, REAL woman with REAL boobs do not flaunt them as if they are freaking whores trying to get guys to slobber all over them.

i mean, how often do you actually see an asian with a D or E cup and that it is ala naturale.

seriously, they give models a bad name. what can i say, they look more like pictures of whores in a brothel. you know where they put your disgusting photo in a clear folder and let disgusting uncles choose from there.

I’m not being jealous, besides, what’s there to have to be jealous? I clearly do not want disgusting old man, no, ANY man to be bloody hell masturbating over my photos dammit. And for the big FAKE boobs, guys, there’s clearly nothing sexy about fake boobs, they ARE afterall silicon. So get real. And I heard they are harder than real ones and leave a disgusting scar around the nipples which in time will look like one giant nipple! Is that their idea of sexy now?

i will not start with the beauty is best natural issue, but don't you think the boob size that we possesse naturally ARE definitely more beautiful since they are made according to our body size and shape.

think about it and tell me what you think.

love,
chanel

ps: being sexy is not how scanty you wear or how big your boobs are but is an attitude that you ooze.

♥ the last words are written at 4:42 PM

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

i have become a case study

ME? A CASE STUDY? YA GOT TO BE KIDDING

well, just came back from another hospital appointment due to a fungal infection on my leg. it looks quite disgusting though.

as i had an appointment, i was given priority over the other patients, and so when my name was called in les then 5 minutes, i've got quite a few curious stares. my doctor, dr lynn teo, senior consultant did a painful swab test at my wound before sending me to another room.

before i had to go to another room, i was made to have another urine test.

at the other room, was another doctor whose name i am unsure of. but as he was scrutinising my leg, i suddenly remembered that i have forgotten to tell the nurse in charge of my urine test that i was having that time of the month. it was kind of weird as i don't feel comfortable discussing my menstrual cycle in front of an male doctor.

just as he was scrutinising my wound, dr lynn came in and started having a 'doctor's conversation'. the kind where you will never understand a thing they are talking about unless you are a doctor yourself. after he came in, another doctor came in to say hi to my mum and they all scrutinised my leg. it seems like they are having a doctor's conference and i have somehow became their case study.

my mum seems to be quite famous there as they all know her. it was after that, that my mum told me that dr lynn was a senior consultant, the second male doctor was the head of department and that the third doctor was actually a dermatology professor. so yea i have became a case study for the high and mighty.

when i heard that i have to do yet another blood test, i swear my heart skipped a beat. damn, i hate needles. they are on my top ten list of most hated after egg yokes. and this time, the needle was damn thick can. and they took not two but three tubes of my precious blood this time. so yea, i need lots of blood now, i'm losing too much, one way or the other.

saw two prisoners walking past which rose my curiosity. i had no idea that prisoners now a days do not wear black and white strips anymore. instead, they wear bright orange. mum told me that it is so that we are able to spot them if they ever escape.

mum noticed an uncle who was sitting down waiting for his turn to see his doctor. while i was walking past him, she noticed that his, well, 'little brother' was standing. which was damn funny la since he looks older than my grandfather and that i was'nt looking my best either with no make up, and only a shirt with shorts.

did another swab test before going to the pharmacy to collect my medication. and my medication, is no joke. hell lot of them, ranging from pills to creams to wash.

ok, signing off

love
chanel

♥ the last words are written at 4:51 PM

Monday, June 04, 2007

club hoppin

DXO, ST JAMES, CLINIC, OR SHARMAINE'S HOUSE?

i learnt one thing yesterday, and that is, sunday is not a good day to club. its seriously freaking boring with songs from the other end of the world. lucky, a few fun hommies is able to turn tables around.

went DXO yesterday because of some salsa competition that my salsa seniors are involved in. turned at that now is actually International Latin Festival, whatever that is. was super boring as firstly, the crowd's age group was freaking old yesterday. i actually see old uncles and aunties. seriously and secondly, we do not know what the hell was going on. after spending eternity to figure out where to get our drinks, we managed to get our drinks (vodka cranberry around the table) and secured a freezing cold table. there was really nothing to do as latin was not really our kind of music. we ended up cam-whoring.

when the competition actually did start, i was a bit startled as i thought its going to be a purely salsa event. but it turned out to actually involve Berchatta(i don't know how to spell it, correct me if i'm wrong), pole dancing and exotic dance. both me and felicia was damn tempted to learn the exotic dance la but i know dear will freak if i did. i then learnt from my seniors that its not a slasa competition, but actually a school competition and that we are all under this dance school called GROOVE and that my dance instructor is actually the vice-principal of this school. how cool is that.

when the competition ended, the excitement also did and so we decided to club-hop and go st. james, since i haven't been there before. when i heard that it was gay night, i was kind of doubtful, but decided to go for the sake of RnB.

to tell you the truth, i actually thought that st. james was a club by itself and so when we reached there, we were like 3 country bumpkins walking around. we went into this club called Movida and it turned out to be having the salsa night as well. and so, when three cam-whoress come together and have nothing to do, its off to the toilet we go to take as much pictures as we can! lucky the toilet was nice, the dressing room was shaped into a circle with a high chimney looking thing at the top.

we the decided to go to the cannery and then choose a club from there, ending up at the Clinic. it was'nt as nice and big as i thought and i did not manage to try that IV drip thingy its famous for, which was quite a bummer. but the music was good, for that moment till they played electrico and retro. had my bourbon coke but their coke seems to be more expensive then their chivas as all i can taste is that. got quite high dancing with sharmaine and felicia as it was uber fun dancing with them. they make great clubbing partners as they are open, doing lesbian dances and stuff.
had some weird people popping up since we started dancing though.

1. two indian uncles wanted to dance with us, but puhlease.... take a look at the mirror
2. a caucasian wanted to have a photo with me
3. another caucasian asked felicia to have a dance with him
4. two guys who kept staring at us, zack and another which i forgot his name, asked to have a dance. ditto to number 1
5. an uncle stared at us as if we were from another world after clubbing
6. three irritating guys with horrible english who has a bad pick up line that says:you have an angel in your eyes.will someon ask them to look into the mirror???

we then went to sharmaine's house to sleep over as the next day, we are meeting our classmates. although we went back quite early, i was freaking tired. think its because i woke up early for church.

sharmaine had a hard time waking me and felicia up and i seriously do not know her reason for her 'highness'. she can get high with no rhyme or reason. but that's what makes her fun la hor, funny face? oops, she's going to kill me for that.

pictures galore! collage all thanks to sharmaine.